A blurry picture of a Christmas tree with lights at Farringdon station London for blogpost Not so special by the Brighton side author the smiling hypocrite
A blurry photo of a Christmas Tree with lights outside Farringdon station, London , photo by The Smiling Hypocrite


NOT SO SPECIAL

Hi again! A couple of people said they enjoyed reading my previous posts, on their own accord, without me asking. Felt really nice, encouraged. At the time of writing this, I had crossed 100 subscribers to the LinkedIn Newsletter. So it was a good start for two weeks of writing, I’d say. It made me feel, well, SPECIAL. Am I? Are you? This is a word I want to dissect today. SPECIAL! In my view, this word is causing more harm than good. For me, it has become toxic. I don’t expect you to share my view, but hear me out.

In the words of Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Headmaster, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, “Words are, in my not-so-humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it.”

And if the word “special” were a spell, I’d petition the Ministry of Magic to decree it as an “Unforgivable Curse”. Everyone wants to be special, do special, travel special, eat special, drink special. Ordinary is an abuse. Average is a cuss word. Common is filthy. If I Google the meaning of the word special (I believe it references from the Oxford Dictionary), it says: “better, greater, or otherwise different from what is usual.” And herein lies the toxicity. Better than usual, WHAT? I’ll tell you the unsaid: in most cases the underlying meaning is better than the usual “people”. Better than others.

We can put all sorts of positive spins to it, but in general, people use it to stand out as compared to others. The problem with comparison is that it is stupid at best, and mean at worst. Most people have a very limited view of the world based on their exposure. Your journey of life, who you meet, what you see, places you visit, will end up determining your view of the world. This in turn will set the baseline "usual" for you. You will develop an image of "special" which will be nowhere special. A student wants to score more marks than the fellow students. Startups want more valuation than their peers. Professionals want to be promoted faster than their colleagues, fall on the "right side of the bell curve". I know of a dear one who orders the last in family gatherings, for, he wants his dish to be different than everyone else (don't judge him, you have done the same, I know). Look at the baseline narcissism in all such examples, one's achievement rests on doing something more than a baseline that had nothing to do with them, their life or their happiness. How sad is it that your only goal in life is to get something more than the people you can perceive around you?


THE ALPACA DOCTRINE – SPECIAL

The warm fuzzy Alpaca says, “Special” is a useless adjective that can be done away with. Understand why you do things. Healthy competition is as healthy as social drinking. Sachin Tendulkar did not become himself by aiming to be better than fellow batsmen, he already was better (assuming you know cricket, for, he is irrelevant for those agnostic to cricket). He tried to play world-class cricket. Make the most of every ball. Einstein was curious about science, not about being used on LinkedIn for motivational stories. Special is a by-product, if it does exist. Aiming to be special only fuels your narcissism, ego, pride, and stupidity. You have not met 8 billion people, or visited 200+countries, or lived through 5 millennia. You have no credible perception of what is USUAL. So there is NO SPECIAL

Do things because you like them. Or because you are good at them. Or because it helps someone. It does not matter how many other people have it or are doing it. Useless notions like being special only separates you from your fellow beings, pushing you into a life long pissing contest. You like drawing, do it – not to make it better than anyone else, just because you enjoy it. Do you understand accounting? Do it! Don’t worry about being cool, it will help someone. Want a car? See what you need it for, or you like, or your budget. But don’t base any of them on what you see around, that does not matter. Next time someone calls you ordinary or claims to have done something special, I’d stay away from them, if I were you. Life is short, don’t try to fit in the herd, don’t try to be special. Be kind to yourself and others. BE YOU, DO YOU.


PEACE!

~ the smiling hypocrite

Back to blog

Post Comment

Featured Collection

1 14
View all